November 24, 2009

Pucker up!

Most people know me as Aqleema, a happy easy-going person, friend, wife, mother, collegue and what have you, who tries her very best to see the glass as half full. There are some people who see me in an utterly different light, they're the ones who see me in the morning and will gladly confess that I do not wake up as myself. Myself I guess must be the sum of a series of more or less conscious decisions. Because my immidiate reaction is neither nice, pretty, kind, understanding, overbearing, subtle or gentle. I think more or less all the people who've tried to wake me before I'm ready to let go of dreamworld have regretted it, one of them till this day recalls the horrifying experience as if it were yesterday. My two year old son tries to wake me every morning and is mostly successful about it, he starts with "mama" "mamaaaa" and then goes on to "darling" darrliiiinggggg" then continues calling me with a sweeter and sweeter voice and caressing my face and turning it towards his. As soon as I'm regaining consciousness he starts jumping around in the bed to finish the job. Everyone else has their more or less quiet methods of evoking my rage not knowing I've convinced myself I'm Snowwhite or Sleeping beauty - depending on the day - and awaiting true love's kiss. Demanding much?! xoxo AQ

November 21, 2009

I'm no longer the Babysitter

I've been upgraded, no longer the beta version for some software.
Almost two and a half years ago I gave birth to my first child, Aiden-Humphrey, like all parents we thought our baby was the cutest thing ever! Imediately after people laid eyes on him, they all agreed that he was the spitting image of my husband. Mind you that for ...oh lets just say the last 6months of the pregnancy, I had hoped that the baby would look like me, since I was the one giving birth and putting my body through the kind of strain only a pregnancy can impose (one of the socalled joys?!). Well not only were everyone telling me that he looked like my husband, they were also very kind as to let me know that there was no way they could tell that this child was related to me. Fun! Thought it ended there, no I've got more. After a bit people started noticing how fair his skin was apparently compared to mine!? At first I really didnt understand what they meant, I'm pakistani and this has always come as a surprise to people here in Denmark and they've always said "oh well, you're not dark at all" or "but your skin is so fair" and I explained that pakistani people come in a various shade of colours. Even before we moved to Denmark people in Pakistan - who by the way make a bigger fuss about the colour of a persons skin - used to always comment on my skincolour in the same manner. So I was really very surprised when this one woman made her observation known to me, saying "oh well his skin is so fair, he's not at all as dark as you are". For a moment I was compelled to look around the room, to see if she really was addressing me, with everyone around me being dane, it was pretty obvious that she was talking about me, and I kept thinking "what is she talking about, my skin isn't dark?!" "I need to look into a mirror" and I did! -with my son in my arms so I could compare our skintone properly.
At the age of 26 I realized for the very first time, that my skin was not fair!!! It took me some time adjusting to my new identity as the dark lady with the white child and I embraced this change referring to myself as my sons babysitter hahaha! No, but that really is the case, but lookswise we were so far apart, that I could only be percieved as his nanny, aupair or what have you.
Privately I joked that had I not been present for his birth, t I might have thought there had been a mixup at the hospital, but alas this cute lil baby was mine. But a couple of days ago Aiden-Humphrey was looking through an album and i found some babypictures of myself! Im glad to be able to report, that this babysitter has now been upgraded to full fledged mommy status, have a look for yourself, my son does look like me too; whoop whoop! The mysterious looks of our younger son Miles-Harvey have also been revealed, no one could tell who he looked like and apparently he's the spitting image of yours truely. Have a look for your self.

November 18, 2009

Diets - headaching much?

So who's not on a diet, which fad are you following? The Soup Diet, The Protein Diet, The Cabbage Soup Diet, The Cottage Cheese Diet, The Atkins, Weightwatchers, The South Beach Diet, The Cookie Diet, The Liquid Diet, The Zone Diet...? I could go on and on and on and so could you!
There are enough weightloss plans out there and for the first time in my life I'm actually dieting and surprised to say that I'm also sticking to it, determined to loose all the babyweight I've put on during my two pregnancies. This has made me look forward to Fridays even more than I used to. Not only because we all get to spend time relaxing as a family, get to go out, maybe even sleep in, I'd like to tick all the above and add another perk to loving fridays which is that I get to act like a total pig. I eat whatever I want and dont care about the amount. To be perfectly honest, after punishing myself for 4 days a week (monday through thursday) not allowing myself my hearts desire. It's the weekend when everyone gets to take some days off from their jobs and that's exactly what I do aswell.
My plan's fairly simple; during the week I keep away from sweets and all unhealthy food, friday-sunday I dont think about what I'm eating or how much I'm taking in. And so far I've lost almost 3kgs in 3,5 weeks, without working out but just changing my diet. It's safe to say that I'm hopeful, its just a matter of time before I start emerging from this padded suit I've been wearing for too long now. Beware, I'm coming out, I want the world to know.... da da da da da... xoxo AQ

November 14, 2009

Heidi Klum is just like... ME!

Heidi Klum's my girl, we're both fat! Wow you know what this means? It's officially socially acceptable to be overweight. Well for the next couple of days... or weeks at best, while Heidi slims down to her usual size and back to playing her game: looking at you face to face saying "now you see me", then turning to the side laughing "now you don't". So ladies enjoy the ekstra kilos being allllllllright but don't take too long doing something about them, remember it's a matter of moments till you and I are morbidly obese ;D

-xoxo AQ

November 10, 2009

Not in hibernation

So winter and dark afternoons are creeping in on our lives in Copenhagen, this is how we plan on surviving and try to make the most out of it, though all instincts point to either fleeing to warmer climates or hibernate. What say you to a blueberry and banana milkshake, warm roasted chestnuts and candle light, we like it!

November 09, 2009

Ugly and real has an expiration date?!

So season 4 of Ugly Betty just begun and i'm wondering if i'm the only one thinking that ugly Betty's no longer ugly. Betty now knows how to manipulate and scheme, she knows the fashion world, she's much better dressed and if im not wrong she even has nicer skin teksture ... and what happened to the bangs, looks like all thats left is her "B" pearl necklace!? What's next she's going to start loosing weight?! I think this ugly Betty might be turning into a swan... and isn't that a little sad, I was convinced they'd leave her untouched and real, xoxo AQ

November 06, 2009

Lessons from the experienced...

My downstairs neighbour has a dog that she walks three times a day, so I happen to run into her either when I'm on my way in or out, well at least a few times a week. She's retired and well I don't know how old she is, but she's had the same white hair for as long as I can remember. And when I say white hair, I mean she litterally doesn't have a single black, brown, red, blonde or grey hair on her head. This woman's always fascinated me growing up, because I never saw her without makeup on -and still don't! Her hair is always put in a fancy curly updo, she's wearing fun shades of glittery eyeshadow (e.g. green or blue are probably er favourites) and her nails are almost always polished in different colours, one chistmas she painted them golden. I think you might be getting the picture by now so I'll move on. Meeting her always starts the same, she asks how things are going and by that ofcourse she means how are the kids doing. You see after having children you're an extention of them, not vice-versa ;) So I start by saying "oh fine" and then ponder that question and change it to "well you know up and down I guess, he's two so what can you expect" or tell her of any given incident that occurred between our meetings. Her reply always has to do with how I can make things easier for myself, 'cause parenthood isn't all that difficult you see; I'd like to share some of the lessons she amuses me with on somewhat of a daily basis, most of the times she just repeats the first three:

"all I had to do was to give my son one good spanking and after that he knew when he was treading dangerous grounds.... oh yes! He knew I had no tolerance for children"
"once I beat him so severely I thought I'd killed him"
"it's just horrible how parents arent allowed to discipline their children nowadays, what's it all coming to"
On getting more sleep as a parent, this was her recommendation:
"putting up the sides to my sons bed and putting some toys in a bag and hanging it on the outside of his bed" apparently it worked like a charm on her son, who merely played with his toys in bed and didn't disturb his sleeping parents until they decided it was morning and got out of bed themselves...

So basically her mantra is beat your child and be happy! I love listening to advice given by people who have raised children and whose children are now well into adulthood. The way they recall a life with small children, what their own children were like, what all children need and require, not to mention what their fundemental rights are... well, lets just say that their memory's been tampered with and for some reason I'm not sure the UN are about to incorporate their ideas into their childrens convention. You make up your own mind... My mum has her own oppinion on how children should be raised, we see eye to eye on many things regarding bringing up children, but in her oppinion, my children - like all children born into this world - have a God given right to be dressed up properly. This doesn't entail wearing warm, soft or adequate clothing, errrr... no! She means that their outfits should be colour coordinated, ironed and looking pretty ;)
My husbands grandmother lives far away from us and we don't get to see her much, but whenever we do visit, she spends every single minute making sure we're either stuffing ourselves with something or are about to. The entire time we're there all she does is make sure she's gathered sufficient amout of food to please us and our stomachs and that's almost all that we talk about while we're there. Everytime we visit, I'm sure one of us is either going to develop anorexia or bulimia, obviously depending on our temperaments hahaha! We've now decided to get her out of her comfortzone and let her come visit us instead, so she won't feel she has to feed us. In her mind grandchildren - and great grandchildren even more so - have the right to everything and anything that's eatable.
Grandparents, bless them, have time to just fill their hearts with love and care like it's nobody's business, and this is the perfect recipe for irrational behaviour and demands. Now tell me, how can this not amuse you?! xoxo AQ